Don't you hate those things?
!PARENTAL ADVISORY!Since the spatula idea never went anywhere, this page is for your pictures of ANY KIND of broken things. Did your husband accidentally smash the toliet bowl while putting a shelf on the wall behind it? Did you (accidentally or intentionally) kick the "vaccume" "kleener" down the stairs? A neighbor throw out a blackened & burned chair after a cigarette got started in the cussion? Did you have an earthquake where the only significant damage was your douchewasher because some bricks fell on it?

Your pictures of broken objects of all sorts is what this page is all about.
Find out how to submit them near the bottom of this web page.

SAVE OUR PLANET! PHOTOGRAPH A BROKEN OBJECT TODAY!

Not UL Listed
THIS WEEK'S MURDERED OBJECT





DING DONG THE TREADMILL'S DEAD!!!


This was sent to me by C.J. of The Netherlands.
C.J. writes, "I was instructed to destroy the treadmill prior to our moving so that we didn't have to drag the heavy thing down the stairs; and on the afternoon of 2011/08/19 we did just that."



Archives of the last few dead or dying pieces of merchandise.
Earlier pictures were taken with a crappy old webcam;
later ones with a real camera. :)
A bombed-out toliet bowl!

OOPS! Lamp faw down go boom!

A mortally wounded chair, and the same dying chair coiled up in a doorway

Scene of a recent faxicide and again.

When Drunken Bunghole Houseguests Attack!

Uh, oh, the coffeepot!

Plant can smashed behind the dishwasher.

Phoney plaster owl run over by a real plastic wheelchair

There's a what in our garbage can?

Some pussywhipped POS vagina-munching dicklick chopped down some plants.

A pissed-on (not pissed-off) light bulb.

A bunch of computer shit busted in an earthquake.

How not to murder your vacuum cleaner.

What happens when you electrocute a light bulb.

Destroying some CD-ROMs

Exploding vacume bag

"Lite" "belb" faw down go boom

Coffee and toliets do not mix

Woman-shaped lamp busted in a San Diego hotel room

O o, mom busted the coffee cup!!!



Some suggestions on how to carry out your task

  • Drop a bowling ball or an anvil on top of the toliet from ceiling-height.
  • Toss a spatula onto the lawn, and run over it with the lawnmower. Run over it multiple times.
  • Have your little brother kick a canister vacuum cleaner down the stairs.
  • Kick over a floor lamp, being sure the light bulb inside of it explodes.
  • Stomp on it! Yeah yeah yeah stomp on it! Break it, break it, BREAK IT!!!
  • Use an electric or manual saw to chop a broken TV up into small, dime-sized pieces.
    Flush the pieces down the toliet. (Be sure to send me the image before disposing of them)
  • Back over the kid's old bicycle with that old hippie van. Nobody will know.
  • Beat the living tweedle out of a cheap vase with a hammer. Stomp on the dead plants inside of it too.
  • Set out an old chair, and hand out things like axes & chainsaws to the neighbor kids and point the chair out.
  • Check the local golf range for bent, twisted and mutilated golf clubs.
  • Run flimsy plastic bowls through the dishwasher. Use the heated drying cycle.
  • Get some old plates, cups & saucers, and drop them on the floor. Tell your friends you had an earthquake.
  • Get your idea from your garage. Most garages are bountifully overflowing with power tools of all kinds.
  • Drop a bowling ball from great height, or smash one with a sledgehammer. Wear a radiation suit when you do this, in case you expose the plutonium core by accident. Photograph it. Use X-ray film if you have any.
  • Replace the household light bulbs with photoflash bulbs. Photograph the end results.
  • Take plenty of pictures if there's an earthquake in your area. Photograph things that the news media would never take pictures of, such as broken toliet bowls, broken TV sets, tipped-over houseplants, telephones knocked to the floor & lying there off the hook, broken fishtanks, and that sort of thing.
BREAK SOMETHING USELESS TODAY!


TO SUBMIT YOUR PHOTOS OF DEAD OR DYING HOUSEHOLD OR OTHER OBJECTS:
  • E-mail the photo to me.
  • In your e-mail, describe what happened to the the object (if you know).
  • You'll receive mail when your picture is about to be displayed - this may be immediately, or may be several days.
  • Pictures may be resized, cropped, or rescanned if they're very large, but the dead object will remain intact.
  • Save your image into .JPG or .GIF format - most graphics programs and photo CD thingies will let you do this or will do so automatically.
    DON'T SEND IN BMP's or I'LL 'NOCK' 'UH' 'WAL'-'MOWNTID' 'PORSELEN' 'URANATER' 'OPH' 'THUH' 'WAUL' 'AHND' 'BETE' 'THUH' 'LIVVENG' 'TWEADLE' 'OWT' 'UV' 'ITT' 'WITHH' 'YER' 'PHAVOURET' 'NEW' 'GALPH' 'KLUBBZ'!!! :-O



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The Joke Fairy
Stricken by The Joke Toliet! Help!


Formerly known as Centre For The Easily Amused Silly Buddies

Featured on Cathie Walker's Silly Buddies!
(Formerly known as 'Centre For The Easily Amused')

5 Star Humor
              Site
Voted a '5 HA!' Humor Site on December 30, 1999




Site contents (C) copywrong 1999-2011 TDC, please ask before using something off this site.. "Spachela H8RED/ BROKEN THINGS" and the associated logo (C) 1999. If you use this on a similar site, I'll have to hunt you down, stomp on your coffeepot, and break it.


DISCLAIMER: The creator of SPACHELA H8RED aka. PICTURES OF BROKEN THINGS will not be held responsible for property damage or personal injury caused by your destroying things using any of the above mentioned methods.
Inserting metal objects in your microwave oven may cause damage to the oven's magnetron and will likely start a fire, which YOU will be responsible for extinguishing.

WARNING! This is a HUMOR site. Please leave immediately if the sight of dead or dying spatulas, washing machines, couches, vases, bowling balls, basketball hoops, sinks, bicycles, lamps, tires, dishwashers, light bulbs, or other objects causes you to want to kick a toliet off the wall.