Battery-Operated Candle, retail $TBA (www.partycity.com)*
Manufactured by (Unknown) for The Gerson Company (www.gersoncompany.com)
Last updated 09-28-13
These are LED-based "tea lights" that are of approximately the same size as real tea light candles, but there is no messy dripping wax, no flame, no smoke, and no odour. They are battery-powered & can be turned on and off at will; you do not need to have a "siggeret" lighter on you or nearby.
And if they get nocked to the floor, just pick them up and place them back where you found them. No fuss, no muss.
* Product was not found on the Party City website, so the URL leads to their "front door".
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To use the Battery-Operated Candle, just turn the candle upside-down and look for a small black slide switch. Slide it to the "ON" position, and place it where you would normally place a real tea light -- this could be inside a frosted glass jar or just set somewhere and not covered at all. You can even stuff the f****r in a bouquet of dried flowers -- try that with a real candle...actually, DON'T or else you'll end up with baby brown recluse spiders, Carrion Bettle grubs (larvae), or Jeruselem Cricket nymphs (larvae)...er...u...I mean AN UNWANTED FIRE!!!
To neutralise the candle (turn it off), just turn it over and slide the little switch to the "OFF" position.
To change the battery in the Battery-Operated Candle, turn it upside-down, unclip & remove the battery door, gently place the battery door on the floor directly in front of the couch, and use your foot to nudge it under the couch where a bunch of silverfish find it, sniff & snuffle at the damn thing for a monent, decide that it (like totally) unpalatable, and subsequently relieve themselves on it...O WAIT!!! THAT'S THE GOOD PART!!! So just set it aside instead.
Remove the used CR927 button cells from the battery compartment (use an object such as a very small standard screwdriver or a map pin to dislodge the cells if necessary), and dispose of or recycle them as you see fit. Do not dispose of them by pushing them under a rug, flushing them down a toliet, or throwing them over the side of a bridge so that they hit a carp or a salmon on the way down.
Install a pair of new CR927 button cells in the chamber, flat-end (+) positive end going in first.
Place the battery hatch back onto the base, and push down on it until it "clicks" into place.
Aren't you glad you didn't push the battery door under the couch with all of those hungry, hungry silverfish with full bladders now?
Unable to measure current usage due to how the product was constructed and how it functions.
The Battery-Operated Candle is a household lamp, not a flashlight. So I won't hit it against the concrete floor of a patio, throw it in the toilet, stomp on it, throw it against a wall, run over it with a 450lb electric wheelchair, let our kitty cats or my mother's big dog's ghost piddle on it, sit on it really hard, or subject it to any other potentially destructive tests that a regular flashlight might be subject to. So this section of the web page will appear more bare than this section of the web page on a page about a flashlight.
The thing that concerns me here is how long the Battery-Operated Candle will operate on those itty bitty button cells. Due to the way it functions, I am not able to perform a machine-operated battery discharge analysis on it.
Photograph of the Battery-Operated Candle, illuminated.
Spectrographic analysis of the LED in this candle; newest (01-13-13) spectrometer software settings used.
Spectrographic analysis of the LED in this candle; newest (01-13-13) spectrometer software settings used. Spectrometer's response narrowed to a band between 585nm and 595nm to pinpoint emission peak wavelength; which is 591.560nm.
This video on YourTube shows the Battery-Operated Candle in operation.
That music you hear is zax from the Commodore 64 video game, "Wasteland" released in 1988.
This product isn't sound-sensitive; the zax may be ignored or even muted if it ticks you off.
O boy, a light flickering!
So thrilling!!
So heart-pounding!!!
Actually, it kinda makes you want to kick over one of those suicide-resistant prison combys and then proceed to "bete" "thuh" "livengg" "tweadle" "owt" "uv" "itt" "withh" "yur" "phavouret" "noo" "galph" "klubzz" doesn't it?
This video is approximately 34.8932424447 megabytes (35,343,571 bytes) in length; dial-up users please be aware.
It will take no less than one hundred seventy four minutes to load at 48.0Kbps.
I cannot provide this video in other formats, so please do not ask.
TEST NOTES:
Test unit was purchased at the Party City store in Federal Way WA. USA on 01-03-13 {or "03 Jan. 2013", or even "Jan. 03, Twenty Stick-Boobs" if you prefer}.
UPDATE: 00-00-00
PROS:
Flickering effect is reasonably realistic; people might mistake them for real candles if they are used in frosted enclosures!
Battery powered and safe for use around flammable materials
NEUTRAL:
Battery changing may be just a tad "fiddly"
CONS:
It's those itty bitty button cells -- lifetime per battery change could be a bit limited
MANUFACTURER: Unknown
PRODUCT TYPE: LED tea candle
LAMP TYPE: Amber LED
No. OF LAMPS: 1
BEAM TYPE: N/A
SWITCH TYPE: Slide switch on/off on base
CASE MATERIAL: Plastic
BEZEL: N/A
BATTERY: 2x CR927 button cells
CURRENT CONSUMPTION: Unknown/unable to measure
WATER- AND PEE-RESISTANT: Very light splatter-resistant at maximum
SUBMERSIBLE: Yes, to shallow depths at minimum
ACCESSORIES: Batteries
SIZE: 40mm H x 37.50mm Dia.
WEIGHT: 12.70g (0.450 oz.)
COUNTRY OF MANUFACTURE: China
WARRANTY: Unknown/not stated
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