Santa's Outhouse, retail $17.98 (
Manufactured by (unknown)
Last updated 09-21-07

This is a Christmas novelty item that features both lights and sound.
It not only plays three Christmas songs, but says 14 phrases in Santa Clause's voice; punctuated by farting noises. While the music, voice, and farting noises are playing, the Christmas lights ringing the top of the outhouse flicker, and a "crescent moon" in the door flickers. And while the farting noises play, the entire unit jiggles.

Figures I would get this evaluation on my website on my birthday (09-15), considering the fact that I seem to be at least mildly drawn to toilets and other fixtures designed for disposing of human waste.

There is an almost empty roll of bungwipe in a TP holder on the *OUTSIDE* of the outhouse; I don't know what it's doing there.

Because this is a novelty, seasonal item and not a flashlight meant to be thrashed, the more abusive tests (like beating it against the concrete floor of a patio or trying to drown it in the toilet) will not be performed on it. That's why "The Punishment Zone" section of this web page is missing.


Whenever you want to activate the Santa's Outhouse, just press and release the button labelled "PRESS ON/OFF" on the base of the product just to the right of the outhouse door. The unit then plays any of three Christmas songs, Santa says any of 14 different phrases, and the unit emits a farting noise while it jiggles. The order of songs and sayings appears to be at least somewhat random.

For some reason, I half-expected it to say "Waste of bungwipe" like you might have heard on the TV program Beavis and Butt-Head.

To change the batteries in the Santa's Outhouse, turn the unit upside-down.

Using a small phillips screwdriver, unscrew the screw on the battery door until the screw starts to feel like it's tightening. This screw is at least semi-captive, so it will not just fall and become lost unless you make a concerted effort to lose it. Use the clip to lift off & remove the battery door, and set it aside.

Tip the three used AA cells out of the unit and into your hand (remove them with your fingers if necessary), and dispose of or recycle them as you see fit.

Insert three new AA cells, orienting them so their flat-ends (-) negatives face the springs for them in each compartment.

Replace the battery door and tighten that screw.

Unable to measure current usage due to how the product was constructed.

Photograph of the Santa's Outhouse playing a Christmas song - and emitting a "farting" noise.

Photograph showing that mostly used roll of bungwipe on the *OUTSIDE* of the outhouse.
How is Santa supposed to wipe when the toliet roll is here? Does he have a spare toliet roll *INSIDE*???????

WMP movie (.AVI extension) showing a small percentage of the Santa's Outhouse's sounds & movements.
This clip is approximately 3.5 megabytes (3,687,380 bytes) in length; dial-up users please be aware.
It will take no less than fifteen minutes to load at 48.0Kbps.
I cannot provide it in other formats, so please do not ask.

Test unit was purchased on the Things You Never Knew Existed website on 09-11-07, and was received on the afternoon of 09-13-07. Because this is a seasonal novelty, the more abusive tests (like beating it against the floor of the outside patio or trying to drown it in the toilet) will not be performed on it!

Product was made in China. A product's country of origin really does matter to some people, which is why I published it on this web page.

Product will not be assigned a star rating () because it is a novelty item meant for only short periods of use on a seasonal basis.

UPDATE: 09-21-07
Received a message this morning as to why the roll of bungwipe might be where it is:

Thought I'd explain [my experience anyway] about the TP irony.

We Chinese people have never used TP on a roll...I've never seen one until I immigrated here 10 years ago...and in the first year we've pretty much used Kleenexes and carried Kleenexes to school since I had no clue why theres a roll of paper on the wall .

in Taiwan, our TP is essentially unfolded sheets of heavy duty paper towels that are folded when your going to use it, and its usually sitting on the cistern of the toilet and usually in a water resistant plastic box because the shower nozzle et al is housed in the same room as the toilet. It didn't surprise me when I visited China on a trip [ChinDao I think] where the hotels placed the wall mounts for TP directly above the cistern instead of to the side.

Its a cultural difference, so when i saw the pic I didn't need to be told it was made in China because thats just how it is....when you need it, then tear a section, fold it and in you go. Obviously the manufacturer was making the outhouse for a Chinese Santa.



    PRODUCT TYPE: Musical, motorised, lighted Christmas novelty
    LAMP TYPE: Incandescent bulb
    No. OF LAMPS: 17
    SWITCH TYPE: Pushbutton switch on/off on side of product
    BEZEL: N/A
    BATTERY: 3xAA cells
    CURRENT CONSUMPTION: Unknown/unable to measure
    SUBMERSIBLE: O he-double-hockey-sticks no
    ACCESSORIES: 3xAA cells
    WARRANTY: Unknown/not stated


    Product will not be assigned a star rating () because it is a novelty item.

Santa's Outhouse *

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