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T-Qualizer EL T-Shirt, retail $34.95 (www.myvirtualzone.com...)
Manufactured by Flashwear (www.flashwear.com)
Last updated 12-10-10

It looks like a black T-shirt.
It smells like a (recently laundered) black T-shirt.
But wait!!! What's that colored thing on the front, and what's that black box connected by a ribbon cable?

The T-Qualizer is a black T-shirt with an EL (electroluminescent) display on the front that looks a lot like a spectrum analyser display on high-end audio equipment; the shirt's display is sound-sensitive, and gives you a nice light show whenever the T-shirt (and its wearer) are exposed to fairly loud music.


To use the T-Qualizer, feed it first (see directly below), and THEN you can go show it off at the rave.

Put it on like you would put any other T-shirt on, with that colored graphic facing the front.
At the lower left of the shirt in a small inside pocket, there is a small black control box in there. On the top of the box, there is a small slide switch. Slide this switch to the "on" position (toward the ribbon cable coming out near the center).

To adjust the sound sensitivity, turn the knob on the side of the control box; clockwise makes the display more sound-sensitive, counterclockwise makes it less sensitive.

Put the controller back in the little pocket until you're ready to turn the T-Qualizer back off.
When you want to turn it off, slide that little slide switch to the "off" position (toward the edge and away from that ribbon cable).

The shirt ***MUST*** be hand-laundered - not machine washed or machine dried!!!
Unplug the controller and get rid of it...er...uh...put it in a dry place before washing the shirt.

Be certain the shirt is completely dry before plugging the controller back on and using the shirt. The plugs on the ribbon cable have arrows on them; just align the plugs so that the arrows are on the same side, and push them together. Do not twist.

Finally, DO NOT IRON the plastic part of the shirt...you'll almost certainly ruin "the good part" if you do.

To change the batteries, look on the small control box for a battery door. Slide the battery door off, gently place it on the ground, and kick it into the garden so the hungry, hungry praying mantids will think it's something yummy for their insect tummies and subsequently strike at it...O WAIT!!! YOU'LL NEED THAT!!! So just set it aside instead.

If necessary, remove the four used up old AAA cells from the compartment, and dispose of or recycle them as you see fit.

Insert four new AAA cells into the compartment, orienting them so their flat ends (-) negatives face the springs for them in each chamber. The chambers appear to be rather tight fitting; you can reef on the batteries a bit to get them all the way in.

Slide the battery door back on, and put the controller back in the little pocket.
Aren't you glad you didn't kick that battery door into the garden with all those hungry, hungry praying mantids now?

Here is what a praying mantis looks like.
I found this guy on the morning of 09-08-06 clinging to the basket of my scooter.

This is an electroluminescent T-shirt, not a flashlight designed to be carried around, thrashed, trashed, and abused. So I won't throw it against the wall, stomp on it, try to drown it in the toilet bowl or the cistern, run over it, swing it against the concrete floor of a patio, bash the controller open to check it for candiosity, fire it from the cannoņata (I guess I've been watching the TV program "Viva Piņata" too much again - candiosity is usually checked with a laser-type device on a platform with a large display or with a handheld wand), send it to the Daystrom Institute for additional analysis, or inflict upon it punishments that flashlights may have inflicted upon them.
So this section of the T-shirt's web page will seem SIGNIFICANTLY more bare than this section of the web page on a page about a flashlight that was born to be a flashlight.

The display looks like a graphic equalizer; but all of the segments respond to sound to the same degree, regardless of its frequency - that is, there is no frequency discrimination circuit in it at all. The display will appear the same whether the sound is low in pitch or high in pitch.

Photograph of the shirt with the display on.

Another photograph of the shirt with the display on; this one is larger and is focused mainly on the EL display.

Spectrographic analysis
Spectrographic analysis of the lowermost (greenish-blue) EL segments.

Spectrographic analysis
Spectrographic analysis of the next lowest (bluish-green) EL segments.

Spectrographic analysis
Spectrographic analysis of the next-next lowest (yellowish-white) EL segments.

The intensity of the orange and pink segments is simply too low to get a measurement from.

USB2000 spectrometer graciously donated by P.L.

WMP movie (.avi extension) showing the product in operation.
The intensity was a bit too high; the display on the shirt looks a bit washed out instead of having vivid colors like it does in real life.
This clip is approximately 16.1 megabytes (16,289,310 bytes) in length; dial-up users please be aware.
It will take no less than forty minutes to load at 48.0Kbps.
I cannot provide it in other formats, so please do not ask.

That music you hear is the Anthrax song "Cadillac Rock Box".
The product *IS*is sound-sensitive; you should have the sound on while viewing this movie clip.

I'm careful as h-e-double-bendy-straws to keep this website G-rated; the part of
the song I used was very carefully checked for potty language; there was none.

Video on YourTube showing the T-Qualizer T-shirt responding to the 1979 song "My Sharona" by The Knack (it came out & quickly reached #1 in June 1979).

This song gets cut off a bit prematurely because my camera only records three minutes of video at a time regardless of how much memory is remaining. Like I wrote above, this product *IS* sound-sensitive; so you should have the sound on while viewing this video.

This clip is approximately 54.225656346792 megabytes (54,579,426 bytes) in length; dial-up users please be aware.
It will take no less than two hundred seventy one minutes (!!!) to load at 48.0Kbps.

Test unit was purchased on the My Virtual Zone website on 07-15-07 and arrived on the afternoon of 08-09-07.

Product was made in Hong Kong.
A product's country of origin really does matter to some people, which is why I published it on this web page.

UPDATE: 00-00-00

    MANUFACTURER: Flashwear
    PRODUCT TYPE: Light-up sound-sensitive EL Tshirt
    LAMP TYPE: EL panels
    No. OF LAMPS: 117
    SWITCH TYPE: Slide switch on/off on controller
    BEZEL: N/A
    BATTERY: 4xAAA cells
    CURRENT CONSUMPTION: Unknown/unable to measure
    WATER- AND PEE-RESISTANT: Light splatter-resistance at maximum
    WARRANTY: Unknown/not stated


    This product is not intended to be used as a light source;
    therefore the standard ratings system will not be used.

T-Qualizer EL T-Shirt * (www.myvirtualzone.com...

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