Click on these buttons to continue the fun!
MISCELLANY: OTHER USELESS TV PRODUCTS
METRINCH
This infomercial is, in a word, GARBAGE.
Hosted by Joe Fowler, a hyped-up sweating speed freak, the program tries to sell you a set of "one-set-does-all" tools.
Nothing could be farther from the truth. While it claims that "Metrinch is the only set of tools you will ever need", they DON'T tell you
that many jobs just can't be done with the tools, as presented.
While the infomercial's announcer claims (and tries to demonstrate) that the wrenches grab the flat surfaces of nuts & bolts, some of the "live" footage clearly shows
otherwise. They catch near the corners of the fastener; much the way "conventional" tools are portrayed as doing.
A demonstration Joe performs, using a piece of transparent acrylic with various fasteners on it, shows the tool obviously just barely
snagging the edges of a worn-out nut. Sure, the Metrinch socket turns the nut. But I bet it wouldn't have had the nut been TIGHTENED first!
In one moment of brilliance, Joe Fowler dumps piles of "warehouse store" tools onto his workbench, then starts picking out things
like allen wrenches and similar tools, loudly proclaiming what a waste they are. There's a reason they make allen wrenches, Joe!
I guess Joe hasn't ever had a futon, a motorcycle, an automobile, an electric scooter, a golf cart, or a lawn mower before.
As his 30-minute tirade on "inferior" tools and tool sets continues, Fowler continues to hop around the set, ranting & raving, and getting all sweaty and icky.
I guess the show's producers haven't heard of paper towels.
For Christ sakes guys, go out and buy a roll of kitchen towels and wipe that crap off once in awhile. Disgusting.
I only hope for the producer's sake that they installed a shower in the dressing room.
One particular quirk that deserves mentioning: Almost everytime Fowler says the word "dollars", he quickly stands up on his toes, then quickly lowers himself
back down. Is this some kind of secret body language communication with the dead? A covert message to Satan? Or is it just plain idiocy?
Fowler should also learn how to PRONOUNCE the name of the product he is selling. HINT: It is NOT pronounced "MET'rench"...
One look at Joe "Foul" Fowler and Metrinch, and I think I'll hang onto my regular toolbox and all those tiny, oh-so-wasteful allen wrenches, thank you.
I need those to fix my motorized wheelchair, because I know for 100% certain that Metrinch won't do the job.
MY RATING: One broken Toilet Brush that belongs ground up in the bag of a Shop-Vac.
Back to Infomercial Quick Click Guide
(Update 10-29-06): I have heard from a user of this product that yes, they're all they're cracked up to be. So...
Infomercial: horrible. Product itself: Worth every penny!
(Update 09-17-09): The following is an actual email I received from another user of Metrinch - his name and email address have been omitted to help protect his privacy and possibly prevent a shooting:
Dear Sirs:
Just want to encourage you to get the Metrinch set. I’d suggest the 72 pc set.
The infomercial may suck, but the tools are flat-out spectacular in their functionality, package size, and range of projects they can be used on.
I’ve had my set for over 10 years. I’ve never in 10 years wanted another set of wrenches or sockets. I do mechanic projects ALL THE TIME.
I’ve owned a Lincoln Town Car for the same 10 years and have used Metrinch exclusively over 205000 miles to:
Change the oil every 3500 miles
Tire rotations
Replace 2 of the coil-on-plug modules
Replace all belt tensioners
Replace front grille
Replace A/C clutch
Replace harmonic balancer (with the Metrinch 6 pc impact set)
4 complete brake jobs
Complete replacement of air-ride suspension to include compressor and bags
Replace passenger and driver’s air bags
Replaced radiator 2 times (hint: don’t buy the cheap $100 radiators, you’ll just end up buying the OEM a year later…)
Replaced air bag clockspring
Replaced keyless-entry keypad
Changed tran-axle gear oil @ 125000
The Metrinch set is my sidearm and worth three times what they’re charging. Lifetime warranty, too…
Sincerely,
{name omitted}
Videos on YourTube showing the infomercial (in three segments).